Flightless Bird

Since I have fully recovered from staying up entirely too late on a work night, I have finally found time to give an account of the insanity that was the midnight showing of Breaking Dawn.


Spoiler alert: DO NOT READ THIS IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN THE MOVIE, BUT PLAN TO.  If you haven't seen the movie and have no desire to do so, read away and enjoy!



This was the first time I had been to a midnight showing, mainly because all of my grown-up friends felt they were far too sophisticated (or smart?) for such frivolity on a Thursday night.  However, this time was different!  My friend Sunni, who I've known forever but we haven't hung out much before, and her mom and I had planned to get to the theater around 8:30 or so and of course that day the weather had changed from brisk, beautiful fall weather to full-on winter with temps in the 40's and colder.  I was NOT looking forward to standing outside.  On lunch I ran out and bought a bunch of hand warmers so that just in case we got stuck in a line that wrapped around the building we hopefully wouldn't turn into popsicles.


We started hearing rumors that the parking lot was full and people were already lining up so instead we got to the theater at 7:00.  Yes.  You read that right - a full FIVE hours before the show was to start.  Thankfully when we got there, there were only about 40 people in the lobby in front of us and we weren't out in the cold.  Sunni went to check out the theater, the number that was printed on our tickets.  I'm still not sure how we did it, but the manager let me go into and save seats for the other two. 


I should mention here that while I did see one theater employee in the women's bathroom mid-meltdown as she tried to change the paper towel roll, the manager was GREAT!  Not only did he let us save seats, he was really nice, came in to check on our theater and wasn't an uptight nut job on a power trip.  Kudos to that guy for making it fun for all of us.


Anyway, by the time Sunni and her mom got into the theater, we still had another 4 hours to kill.  Next time, we'll be bringing a deck of cards, something to watch a movie on, Nooks, etc.  Thank goodness I upgraded to the iPhone 4 because the battery on my old 3 phone would have died an hour into this black-hole of time.  I read a little, played a little, talked a little, at a little... and really, those 4 hours did not drag by.  Also, next time there is a high probability that I will be in jammy pants.  :)


Finally, the movie started...  Twilight, for me, is one of those guilty pleasures.  I don't want to like it, but I can't help myself.  I don't think Kristen Stewart can act her way out of a paper bag (and she wasn't always like that.  Did anyone see In the Land of Women?  I LOVED that movie and didn't think she was nearly as twitchy - nor did she make sounds like she was choking through the whole thing!).  I think Robert Pattinson's acting was better this time & I credit Reese Witherspoon for helping him improve his skills in Water for Elephants.  I thought the wigs were MUCH better in this movie and the make up was good (although RPatz did look like the contacts were bothering him in a couple of scenes).  Poor Nikki Reed - all I can figure is that she is so gorgeous in real life, the make up artists were trying to ugly her up.  She just seemed so unnatural to me... you know, more unnatural than the usual vampires.  LOL!


Sadly, Taylor Lautner keeps his shirt on through like 95% of the movie. 


If you were worried about letting the kiddos see the honeymoon scene, then don't be.  All the hype that was made about the headboard breaking was just that; hype.  It certainly didn't borderline on HBO, more like the CW after 7:00 pm.  The book was much more detailed than the movie ever thought about being, especially in that scene.


Question:  Why wasn't Edward sparkling in all that beachy sunlight?  Did they think the audience wouldn't notice glitter boy didn't look like he'd been bedazzled?


There was only one part of the movie that I really didn't care for and that was the wolves in the lumber yard when Jacob splits from the pack.  When we were kids, my brother had this He-Man castle that had a microphone on it that made your voice kind of have an echo effect.  I'm pretty sure the production team used the Castle Grayskull plastic microphone for the wolves voices.


The scene stealers in the movie were, as always, Kellan Lutz, Jackson Rathbone, Booboo Stewart and Billy Burke.  I was really glad to see Jasper get a lighter role than he had before. 


I laughed, gasped, hid my eyes and was grossed out through the movie.  The whole baby-removal scene was gag-worthy in the book and in the movie too although I think it was tamed down for the big screen.  It still weirds me out that Jacob imprints on Renesmee too and nothing you can say will change my mind about that.  I kind of hate myself for liking this story...


I think the whole basis of the story of the Twilight Saga is redonkulous


If you go see Breaking Dawn expecting to see an Oscar contender, you will be sorely let down.  But, if you go into it accepting it for what it is, a two-hour break from reality, then go and enjoy it!  As for me, I'll be buying a copy of the movie when it's released, probably checking out through one of those do-it-yourself lanes so no one sees me.  And of course I'll be getting tickets to the midnight showing of Part 2, mildly disgusted with myself.  :)

Season of the Witch

I thought it might be fun to blog about my trip to Salem, Massachusetts not only to share the experience with you all, but so I could remember it myself later on! 

First off, I flew up to Hartford, CT on Wednesday night & drove straight to the hotel in Springfield, MA.  Thursday I spent the whole day helping Chad at Equine Affaire, which basically meant I spent nearly 12 hours straight standing or walking.  After it was over, I crashed for the night.  Friday morning I left Springfield at about 9:30 & wound up taking mostly 2-lane roads the whole way to Salem to avoid the toll roads.

Let me say this – sight-seeing alone is not for the faint of heart.  If you can’t handle going to dinner or a movie alone, you probably won’t be able to handle vacations or day-trips by yourself.  This isn’t the first time I’ve done something like this, but going to New England in the fall has always been something I’ve wanted to do and I’ve been fascinated by the Salem Witch Trials for some time.  And as the saying goes, nothing ventured, nothing gained.

I made my way to downtown Salem and immediately headed for the water.  I had to see it before I did anything else.  I parked kind of out of the way down near the harbor a block or so down from the House of the Seven Gables.  There was a tour starting later so regrettably I left without seeing much of the property.

I walked a couple of blocks more to the Derby Warf.  Now, I don’t know how long the wharf really is, but it felt like it was half a mile and with the Atlantic on either side, it was frigid!  I wish the lighthouse had been bigger, more like what you traditionally imagine a lighthouse to be, but it was very neat to see something that had been built in 1871 & is still in use today.  On the walk back to the shore, I noticed many of the houses facing the harbor had balconies and widow’s walks.  I could imagine the women of the town looking fervently at the water waiting for the ships to bring their loved ones home. 

I crossed Derby Street through Orange Street and the houses were so closely set to one another.  You could literally sit in your house and peer through your neighbor’s windows without binoculars.  They could probably pass you a cup of sugar from house to house without having to go outside!

I turned off of Orange Street onto Essex and passed the Hawthorne Hotel.  It wasn’t as cold away from the waterfront but it was not warm by any stretch of the imagination.  I passed Crow Haven Corner, a witch shop and Remember Salem which is a shop dedicated to Harry Potter.  Had I not been to The Wizarding World of Harry Potter earlier this year, I probably would have spent a fortune in there!

I turned back around and walked to Washington Square and passed a wedding that was starting in the park.  I went on up to Brown Street where an imposing statue of Roger Conant stood outside of the Salem Witch Museum.  There was another tour starting in just a few minutes so I bought my ticket and got in line behind a bunch of tenth graders from Maine that had just read The Crucible.    The museum was actually a little trippy and full of wax figures.  Had I know that, I would’ve been a little less gung-ho to check it out. 

If you don’t know much about the Witch Trials then I’ll give you a brief run-down.  Back in 1692 in Puritanical Salem, 150 townspeople were accused of witchcraft.  Of those 150, 19 were put to death by hanging and one man was pressed to death.  It started out by young girls who were bored and not allowed to have any fun.  Once they started accusing people, other people hopped on board the witchcraft train.  The people that were convicted actually did not practice witchcraft, but it was a way for people to get back at those who had wronged them.  Giles Corey even testified against his own wife as the result of a marital spat.  Also, anyone who entered a plea (guilty or not guilty) had his or her property confiscated, so even if you claimed you were not guilty, the village took control of anything you owned.   So, say your neighbor had more than you and you were envious by claiming he was a witch was the easiest way to take away all he had amassed.  Finally the state stepped in and put an end to the hysteria and eventually the young girls that started the whole thing admitted to making the accusations for no real reason.

The Salem Witch Museum tells the more in-depth history of the trials and then goes into the evolution of witches from Pagan women who were proficient at using herbs for cures and midwives to the witches seen in pop culture and Wiccans that practice today.  I found it interesting that Satan and evil have no place in their religion.

Once I left that tour, I went back down to Essex and up a few more blocks to some souvenir shops and even went into Hex, a witch shop.  It was a little freaky at first, but there weren’t any dead bats or jars of eyeballs so I thought that was a positive sign.  Hey, when you’re in Salem, you’ve got to have a look around, right?

I went back to Crow Haven Corner as I had read that they would have a Witch Walk which was advertised as “Join true Salem Witches as you’re blessed in a magic circle, visit a graveyard, and learn the truth about spells, voodoo dolls, love potions, herbal charms, and even curses!”  Now, before you get all freaked out over it, they weren’t having the witch walk after Halloween.  Still, I was curious about it.  If you’re not curious about things you never learn anything new.  So, I didn’t get to do the witch walk, but I did meet with a psychic witch for a short reading and left with my own mojo bag.  There isn’t anything supernatural about it other than the fact that the witch said a prayer to God to bless the ingredients which are a couple of herbs and a quartz stone.  However, while I was in there looking at things to buy, a man came in to buy herbs for a spell he was doing!  I was completely enthralled by him but trying not to stare with my mouth gaping open, but I’m not sure I succeeded.  The guy didn’t look scary or menacing and was very nice to the guy working who waited on him.  It was a learning experience, that’s for sure!

I did a little more shopping when I was done at Crow Haven Corner but I had been out in the cold for nearly 5 hours, walking constantly again.  I was tired, cold and hungry and the car was several blocks away still.  So, I slowly made my way back to the waterfront and past the House of the Seven Gables again.

I was so surprised at how courteous the drivers in Salem were.  The pedestrians ALWAYS had the right-of-way and even when I was waiting for the light to turn so I could cross, more than once drivers stopped and waved me to go on.  The town was very clean and welcoming.   Also, I thought the town would be small, sort of preserved in its Puritanical state but that’s not the case at all.  It’s not hokey or fake, the town has grown around it’s gruesome past yet still preserved the history and memory of the witch hysteria. 

I’m very glad I had the chance to go check out Salem and would love to go back another time!